Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Reproductive Crisis

Before reading on, please know I'm WAITING on the results as of this time. NOTHING is confirmed but lots is suspected.

On January 26th, I went in to the doctors to have my bloodwork done to determine if I am indeed ovulating. For the past week or two, my feet have been REALLY cold and my weight loss has been at a standstill/plateau so I added on a thyroid check. Thank God I did that.

Thursday, the 27th, I began having some intense pain in the ovary area. It was to the point where standing up was the most comfort for me. I figured something good must be happening in there because I've never felt that before.

Flash forward to 3am today (1-31-11) when I woke up choking on my vomit. Lovely. I threw up quite a bit this morning (I'll spare you the details) and just wasn't feeling well. I called off work considering the nausea lasted for a while and I just wasn't feeling 100%.

The doctors office called with my test results from the 26th. I was glad to be home for the call because I just CRIED over them. I'm so upset about this because really no one is going to understand this best unless you are a fellow PCOS-er (no offense).

My results came back that I did ovulate, however, my progestrone was at level 6 and it needs to be 10 or higher for a SUCCESSFUL and viable pregnancy. In addition to the 6, my thyroid came back BAD. Dr. P is completely puzzled as to WHY my thyroid went from awesome to BAD during this cycle. My thyroid was at 3.35 which explains the plateau and the cold feet. I know my body well and I know if my weight isn't moving and if my feet are cold (even though it is winter), that my thyroid is off. A healthy thyroid range is 0.2-5 HOWEVER, a woman trying to have a baby needs a number less than 2. With the combination of the 6 and the 3.35 this means that if I am in fact pregnant right now, the possibility of chemical pregnancy and/or miscarriage is HIGH.

The nurse asked me when I was due for my period and I told her it has been coming religiously on the 4th of the month. She talked to me about my options for a bit. I could have a month off of TTC and get my thyroid under control OR I could get my thyroid under control and then opt for chlomid or femara for a stronger ovulation. Dr. P indicated that he will be taking over my charts from here on out for my thyroid now as well as for my pcos and infertility. This is the good news. He absolutely refuses to put me through a miscarriage on his watch if he can help it. The nurses all read the letter I wrote him before Christmas and they all cried and Deb (my nurse) said he's taken a special interest in me knowing my full history. I swear I'm going to name my kid after this man. Anyways...I told them I just needed some time to think and hung up.

I talked to Mark and then it hit us, "What if we're pregnant now..." I failed to mention to them that I've been throwing up and I've been reading up on this and morning sickness CAN happen as early as 3 weeks but for most women its weeks 6-12. Considering I'm a medical mystery, this sent us into a panic and I called Dr. P back and explained the cramping I had earlier in the week and the fact that I was home sick (throwing up) and just feeling like crap for no known reason. They immediately faxed in a blood order for several tests including pregnancy and progestrone level.

See the thing that needs to be understood is some women with low progestrone get pregnant and the body self corrects with no issue. However, for pcos women, this isn't always the case as our ovaries tend to misbehave (for lack of a better word). The low progestrone + pcos + bad thyroid level = potential recipe for disaster.

So ideally, what we are hoping for is for the pregnancy test to come back NEGATIVE (yea, first time wanting that).

IF we get a positive we really don't know what will happen to us or the baby at this point. A lot of testing was done today and to be honest, I need to stop typing as I've cried enough today. We won't know how to deal with it until we know what the HCG and progestrone say.

The fact of the matter is we're a bit scared right now. We don't know why this is happening but what we do know is I got a two level bump on my thyroid meds which should prevent this from happening again.

I've got a lot of faith in my doctor. I'm completely trusting in him and God that we'll be okay, but even though I trust - it doesn't mean that Mark and I both aren't terrified right now.

So now... we wait.

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